Yesterday I loathed you for being proud of my accomplishments.
For brimming with that pleasure, that not-mock-joy so full of love and respect.
Yesterday I felt empty and stared into empty spaces.
Feeling the void – and wanting to fill it.
With empty dollar bags with smiley faces on them.
Yesterday I listened to the same song over and over again.
A song penned and vocalised by a friend.
Yesterday there was too much in the middle and too much in between.
Yesterday I loathed myself for making promises,
I don’t feel strong enough to keep.
My lonely heart that beats more slowly now longed for reconciliation,
With the beast.
Yesterday I struggled.
Today, I can only hope to struggle less.
“..light this null space let me touch base, let these heat rays set ablaze this fireplace..”
LINEN // FORTUNES